Really?

I am sitting here on my sofa wondering what I could be doing right now. I could totally be working on some of my projects that I have to do but I am totally not motivated. I have a couple wedding bids that need to be planned and typed...but yet again, not motivated. I have been doing a lot of soul searching lately, wondering what I want to do with my life. I have applied for numerous jobs nationwide and I have to say that I am getting very discouraged. But I have to tell myself that I am talented and that the right opportunity will come along. I have to wonder though...Am I good enough for the jobs that I'm applying for? or is the timing wrong? Or is God trying to tell me something?

I couldn't imagine that God wants me to stay here where I am not happy, and not living up to my potential. My talents aren't being utilized to their fullest here where I am, and I know that I would be much happier in a larger city, where I can make more money and do what I really love to do; DESIGN! I feel like my day is filled copying a picture or making things that I really wouldn't put my name behind if I were the owner of the store. I understand that even in a larger city, I may not be doing million dollar arrangements, but my talents and skills would be utilized and appreciated.

I also feel that my growth is being stunted a lot in my current position, for example; just the other day a woman called the shop and ordered an unusual and unique arrangement, I did something very cool, yes! it was off the wall, but it was very unique and outside of the box. The woman received it, called and complained....She brought it back in, said that it was ugly and that she felt like it wasn't a "bouquet". My boss proceeded to tell her that this is the look that we do at the shop, and she said she would prefer an arrangement in a vase....or get this....A MUM plant!!! Really??? lady, a mum plant? that's different an unusual? give me a break! so yea...I need to be in a place where the general public doesn't consider a mum plant as being different!

And please don't get me wrong, I am not bashing Kent's or Columbia. I love my job, and I love my hometown. Kent has been so good to me and he is an amazing boss. I love him like my own family. And everything that I know is here in Columbia, my family, my friends and my home. But there is a whole world out there that I have yet to see. I have never been one to accept mediocrity, and I don't intend to start. My issues aren't my boss or where I work, my issues are with the amount of money that I am not making, and the people that call themselves our customers.

so...yea....REALLY??